Write a coherent story with random.txt - Wherein Null's autistic gimmick is put to productive use

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Sexy Senior Citizen

What's the big deal? It's called a fetish!
kiwifarms.net
What it says on the title. The story can be of any length. However, any and all lines- narrative or otherwise- have to come from the random.txt. If you don't know what that is, it's the weird quotes under the search bar in the top right.
I'll start:
"Dynastia has found out where I Live, and I'm really scared now."
"suck my flacid tranny cock."
"FIRED FROM LIFE!!!"
"U KNOW FUCKING WHY SSHOLE"
Feeding off each other's negative cyber energy.
"AUGH YEAH FOLKS"
"ugh my vagoominah hurts"
"Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a reality cartoon."
 

Cossack

Nous n'irons pas à tes sabbats!
kiwifarms.net
Marked each character speaking for convenience.
P1. *HIIIISSSSS* *BANG* HAHAHAHAHEHEHEHAHA

P2. YOU PUT ME ON A SINKING SHIP. I fucking hate you. You've had to fuck my life up even more so, all in the name of some cheap laugh you fucking tard.

P1. srry cant hear you over the sound of my cool gender.

P2. I am not a million dollar extra. Uncouth Bastard! Ugh!!!

P1. As if I've got a future. *sigh*. if you ever feel bad for yourself just remember you're not as sad as the dudes on kiwifarms.

P2. The fuck is a Kiwi farm?
 

Cricket

daddy/daddy/dadself
Staff Member
Intelligence
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
A romance story between a Kiwi and EDFer:

”WHY DIDN'T GRANDMA WARN ME”

”Believe me, if that snake didn't want to be fucked, you'd know it. But sick fucks messed with the wrong fucking deer. [Encyclopedia Dramatica] was my job for almost a decade.”

”what does autism have to do with any of this?”

“just cause im a crazy mother fucker doesn't mean i cant tell you guys really need some help. kiwifarms is like that mixed-breed dog that only got the shitty parts of each of the different breeds and its probably only gonna live to like 2 before it turns into dog jello”

“it's bad for my mental state being on there, my support worker warned me. Can’t a person share what they feel without worrying it will end up on some shit hole site like yours?”

”Every time The Kiwi Farms gets caught trying to condemn children to a life of drugs, gangs, drinking, rape, incest, verbal abuse, physical abuse, and a number of other horrors, it promises it'll never do so again. The entire point of that site is to kill mentally ill trans women, Cyberbullying and harassment. bullies and makes fun of people with mental illness ”

”Guy turns into woman, to get woman? I mean, do you see? We're going mad!”

”YOU WANT ALL THIS TO GO AWAY THEN GO BUY A TOOTOO AND GET YOUR CAMERA OUT FATBOY ”
 
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Eddward

Life has many doors, Ed-Boy
kiwifarms.net
1.
”Everyone MASS report to the FBI all the Cyber Bullying that Kiwi Farm”
”Kirby: 10/15/2015 - Justice is served and Kirby is found innocent of being a pedo.”
”Dear leader's justice is so swift.”

2.
”i am unfortunately still alive”
”trust me i look great now”
 
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