YUMMY DINNER IDEA!!! 8/30/2019 -

E

EH 110

Guest
kiwifarms.net
"I just got out of the shower." (BULLSHIT!) "I wash my hair maybe once a week." (BULLSHIT!)
She washes her hair maybe zero times a week. She talks about cutting her hair every few months. I wish she finally would.

I dont even know how she got her hair to this point? Does anyone know what ethnicity she is? Cuz I've never seen hair grow that long before.
Really? It's uncommon for people to grow their hair that long (and it never looks flattering, IMO), but I've seen people with hair to their calves. There are forums/groups for people with really long hair.
 

Keyboard Warrior

kiwifarms.net
LAH #01
She's "pushing forward" for the people out there struggling with mental illness.

Bullshit. She gets paid for this. She gets paid to do nothing. She doesn't get extra credit for being a Boss Babe just cause she rolled out of bed before noon. lol Does she pat herself on the back for remembering to inhale AND exhale, too? Nobody tell her what "involuntary" means! Let's see if she'll take credit for blinking. I bet she would.

"Pushing forward." How insulting to anyone that has to actually work for a living and doesn't get the luxury of taking an entire season off to pig out and fuck around, and then complain that their entire body aches.

She's leaning on counters now, and muting her breathing, so I guess being a human garbage disposal has consequences. 🤷‍♀️

Gorl is utterly fucked without this gig, and I can't wait to hear her excuse for quitting tomorrow.
 

peengu

kiwifarms.net
I dont even know how she got her hair to this point? Does anyone know what ethnicity she is? Cuz I've never seen hair grow that long before.
There's no ethnicity trick about it, it just hasn't been cut for a long time. And it's not good hair either. She clearly has issues with her scalp, she produces sebum out the ass, and tying it in a big clump of a knot at the top of her head only strains the hair and hair follicles more . I bet she has matting at the back and that her hair snaps every time she takes her hairband out. Take her to any hairdresser and they'd suggest at least a foot off MINIMUM, then probably layering to shorten it further. It's not nice hair. It's thin and brittle and flat and full of split ends.

Not like it matters anyway once the beetus really starts to set in. I don't think bald patches are very dainty.

E: spelleen
 

Fandom Trash

Cutest Dumpster Cat around
kiwifarms.net
I also notice she calls anything she eats"yummy" and it sort of loses its meaning whenever she eats is delicious.

Those microwave food aren't that great, and I dont think microwave veggie is nutritious at all.
 

ADHD

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Let’s be doubly honest; she’d make Becky dumpster dive if she saw what looked like french fries.
What? Surely you jest! Our dainty gorl, always rolling around with a minimum of $1500 in her purse, isn't going to eat dumpster fries! :story:

She'll just demand Becky take her somewhere so she can get some nice hot, fresh fries. And maybe a chicken sandwich. And a diet Coke. And maybe some ice cream.
 

Whatthefuck

kiwifarms.net
She should really cut her hair at this point. The way she looked in Eric's birthday video was pretty horrifying. She looked absolutely terrible with her hair down and covering most of her chubby cheeks.

I dont even know how she got her hair to this point? Does anyone know what ethnicity she is? Cuz I've never seen hair grow that long before.
She claims to be Portuguese, but she honestly just white trash mutt. There’s nothing wrong with being a mutt, I think lots of folks over here don’t have clear lineage, Lord knows my stock isn’t cut and dried, but she claims Portuguese because it seems exotic? Much the same way Becks is descended from British royalty...apparently.
 

Serial Grapist

I Will Crush You 👠🍇
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I also notice she calls anything she eats"yummy" and it sort of loses its meaning whenever she eats is delicious.

Those microwave food aren't that great, and I dont think microwave veggie is nutritious at all.
She has no discernible personality of her own so she just mimics what she thinks she is supposed to do or what she has seen other mukbangers (her idols) do.
IMO, I doubt she enjoyed this at all. Typically, when she really enjoys her food her eyes go wide and she gets giddy, she doesn’t humbly nod like this, and only film herself shovelling in two mouthfuls.


EC5D98DD-D792-4C99-AEC4-322103D14ED2.gif
 

Whatthefuck

kiwifarms.net
She has no discernible personality of her own so she just mimics what she thinks she is supposed to do or what she has seen other mukbangers (her idols) do.
IMO, I doubt she enjoyed this at all. Typically, when she really enjoys her food her eyes go wide and she gets giddy, she doesn’t humbly nod like this, and only film herself shovelling in two mouthfuls.


View attachment 914564
This has feeder porn written all over it. I’m not saying, I’m just saying.
 

Gorlax

kiwifarms.net
For the record, our gorl’s not going to any salon or beautician any time soon. She’s deluded about her appearance, but she’s aware enough that she’s deluded to stay away from people who would call her out on just how disgusting her hygiene and up-close appearance is. Obviously a hair stylist wouldn’t trash a paying client’s hair no matter how terrible it was, but Amber knows they would bring up how little she shampoos/conditions as well as the dandruff and that’s enough to make her nope out of that situation.
Just like how she smothers herself in tards to avoid anyone contradicting her Very High IQ, she will stay the hell away from the salon because she can’t wear her Snapchat filters in and she knows these beauty professionals who actually know what an attractive person looks like will be laughing behind her hump when she leaves. Not to mention as someone mentioned above, I agree that her hair is sort of a security blanket. Cutting it would be a change, and change = bad therefore no.
 

GargoyleGorl

Token SJW
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Her shoes are SO LOOSE you guyz because NOT SWELLEEN. *Internet already has seen SwollenLynn and her ready-to-burst shoes at Eric's party*
If I didn't know better, I'd think she was mocking my post where I said something about "my last shred of sympathy" and her swollen feet.

Thus my slow descent into MOTI begins. This video is gonna be great.

Response: Appreciated. Apparently it's "rude" to tell someone when you've lost all hope for them.
She doesn't know what words mean. Anything that hurts her feelings, however mildly it hurts or how justified it is, is "rude". Just like how anyone who says it is a "bully" for making her feel bad for a moment. She doesn't get that there's a meaning to "hurtful" outside of "hurts AL's feelings" and she doesn't get that something hurting AL's feelings doesn't make it untrue or even mean.

The definitions are contingent on how AL herself, as the center of the fucking universe, is impacted.

when you look at her shirt and go "hm ok that's an interesting design..."

...then you realise that's the shape of her arms
So has Left Cup just given up completely now? I know it's been suffering for a while, but there doesn't seem to be any trace left. (Mind you, I didn't look all that hard and I'm NOT going back to double-check.)

"I'm doing this [vlogeen] because there are people with mental illness who can't take a break from work." - direct quote from the maw of Amberlynn.
No, most adults ADAPT and fucking DEAL WITH THEIR CIRCUMSTANCES. They also might have friends and family who actually like them and would be willing to help them through a rough patch.

I don't know if she means this as, "Therefore, I can't risk getting a real job because of my mentals" or "Therefore I'm doing this for all the mentally-ill suckers who still manage to contribute to society". I don't know which is more insulting. I think my blood pressure just spiked though, so at least the MOTI is coming along nicely.

Damn, did she forget drinking that “lower peehached” peasant’s water is going to give her a severe case of heartburn?
Okay. I didn't want to do this, but it looks like I'm gonna have to do this.

Sprite Zero has a pH of 3.14. Tap water in Kentucky is going to average out at about 7.5. According to our gorl, the water she buys is "7.5 or higher". (Timestamped video for reference.)

I'm not even going to finish this thought, because anyone with two braincells to rub together sees where I'm going with it.

(BY THE WAY, "pH balanced" is actually the marketing tag for Secret brand deodorant, and it's about as meaningless there as is it is when applied to that water of hers -- but it's also likely the only context in which she's heard the term pH used, so that's what she goes with, and I just... This bitch. This bitch right here.)

She's shooo proud that she went to bed at 4 am and woke up at 11.
Bitch what???

It makes me moti that people have to wake up early for work while this fatass stays up all night, and then pretends that it's some kind of achievement that she woke up at 11...
She's doing it for us. Just like with the mental illness thing.

For us, bro. She stays up until 4 am playing games on her mobile phone and coloring mandalas for us.

but hobbits do farm work and other labor things during the day, unlike our girl.
What part of for us don't you haydurs understand?!?

im still amazed at how she just cant see how fat she really is, she has to feel it right?
right?
She doesn't feel much of anything. Whatever nerves haven't been killed off by the beetus are just completely numb from being compressed by fat.

I think she keeps it as a security blanket.. like it somehow distracts people from her massive body when she's feeling "swollen."
Someone once told her that short hair wasn't appealing on fat women, because longer hair balanced out their profile. We know this because she's repeated this. What she doesn't get is that it doesn't scale -- an extra 80 lbs can't be offset by an extra 6 inches of split ends.


LAH #01
She's "pushing forward" for the people out there struggling with mental illness.

Bullshit. She gets paid for this. She gets paid to do nothing. She doesn't get extra credit for being a Boss Babe just cause she rolled out of bed before noon. lol Does she pat herself on the back for remembering to inhale AND exhale, too? Nobody tell her what "involuntary" means! Let's see if she'll take credit for blinking. I bet she would.

"Pushing forward." How insulting to anyone that has to actually work for a living and doesn't get the luxury of taking an entire season off to pig out and fuck around, and then complain that their entire body aches.

She's leaning on counters now, and muting her breathing, so I guess being a human garbage disposal has consequences. 🤷‍♀️

Gorl is utterly fucked without this gig, and I can't wait to hear her excuse for quitting tomorrow.
FOR US, DUDE.

I'd say I'd like to shake some sense into her, but if the seismic jiggles she experiences every time she lurches a half-step towards the fridge don't do it, there's nothing my puny human arms could do.

I just want to say for the record this bitch is not quitting YT. She may be quitting the 100 days of garbage because she ran out of pre filmed videos but rest assured this fat fuck will be back in time for Christmas Ad Sense payouts.
I admit I've been out of the loop for a couple days, but I'm sure she said she'd already quit that. Or was that just daily weigh-ins, not daily videos that was putting her in a "bad mindframe"?

Whatever. We all knew she wouldn't stick with it. Her announcing the end is just a formality.

This has feeder porn written all over it. I’m not saying, I’m just saying.
And we wonder why she eyefucks herself and refuses to cut her byootiful hair? Someone out there is telling her she's hot, and she's far too dumb to understand what a fetish is so she just goes with it.

For the record, our gorl’s not going to any salon or beautician any time soon. She’s deluded about her appearance, but she’s aware enough that she’s deluded to stay away from people who would call her out on just how disgusting her hygiene and up-close appearance is. Obviously a hair stylist wouldn’t trash a paying client’s hair no matter how terrible it was, but Amber knows they would bring up how little she shampoos/conditions as well as the dandruff and that’s enough to make her nope out of that situation.
Just like how she smothers herself in tards to avoid anyone contradicting her Very High IQ, she will stay the hell away from the salon because she can’t wear her Snapchat filters in and she knows these beauty professionals who actually know what an attractive person looks like will be laughing behind her hump when she leaves. Not to mention as someone mentioned above, I agree that her hair is sort of a security blanket. Cutting it would be a change, and change = bad therefore no.
To be fair, how could she trust the judgment of some prole who works for a living and has such poor taste as to eschew cat ear headbands and jewelry bought by the pound off eBay? No way she'd entrust someone like that with her second third fifth best feature, boo-boo.

Oh well. I'm sure tomorrow's video will definitely leave me less aggravated and definitely won't make me regret that day I discovered this complete fucking trainwreck. :optimistic:
 
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