LGBT 03-01-17 Chris fights like a girl
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With Chris' ego, he probably thinks he's one of the pretty and passable ones......not like those lowly crossdressers, who don't even take hormones and stick semen in their freezer.
It's not even his ego (that's part of it but not the ignition), he legitimately can't remember what people look like and had to stare at himself in a mirror every day just to remember what he looked like. Chris probably sees what we see when he looks in the mirror, but then he looks away, and, like a goldfish, he's a whole new world where he just assumes he's an attractive women because, well, ego.
That's actually a bull, but whatever, a pig works best for Chris anywayl
Pigs are clean, intelligent animals, and at least half of them are self-aware and can recognize themselves in a mirror. I think pigs far surpass chris.
Dr. Tremolo
kiwifarms.net
Well he's got a little Chun-Li within himself
M
MY 405
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kiwifarms.net
Spray, delay and walk away ... Oh wait, that's the "putting on perfume" rule ... Or leaving GameStop because "surprised as though by a rapist" rule. Some of the Soviet Union's best snipers were women. No word on who medaled first in the Pepper Spray and Run From the Cops Marathon, but I bet I can guess.
Well, Elmer is/was married to Elsie (a cow), but then I suppose it's been so long that the Borden's brand of products have become a faded memory around here.
Is fatty's double chin the biggest its ever been? Tubby needs to lay off the butterbeer.
He also needs to lay off the Eau De But mixed with cheap perfume.
M
MY 405
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kiwifarms.net
Capt. Derail has arrived! I have this weird job where I occasionally make a weird call and I once said to Borden, "HOW messed up is it that Elsie (the condensed milk mascot) is married to Elmer and he's GLUE already!" The dude was actually shocked, started laughing his ass off and said he was absolutely going to bring that up because NO ONE at Borden had ever thought that. It's just creepy. Poor Elmer. Regardless, Chris doesn't have the smarts of a pig to figure his way out and he's already thrown around enough bull to fill a stock barn at the county fair.
In the 90s, I swear that thing looked like a pig.
I'm sure you're not the only one, of course Elmer's design was overly-simplified on the package.
Wonder if that's why most elementary schools lately have removed the ropes out of their gym classes, they want to prevent headaches of watching kids like Chris do this!
Subconcious Offense
kiwifarms.net
And hitting people with their cars, can't leave that one out.
I think that goes under "hit and runs"
Chris is so bad at dressing like a woman that I sometimes forget that's his goal. It's such a mess that I tend to view it more as if a parent let their 6 year old make their own outfit from anything they could find in the house. It's not them trying to dress like a boy or a girl but rather an amalgam of shit they're trying to imitate from cartoons and kid's movies. Of course in Chris's case it's more "I like some girly stuff and I like that girls have been nice to me so I must be a girl because someone told me you can change sides now"
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I think all it took to make Chris go full "tomgirl" was someone saying that Chris should "get in touch with his feminine side."
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